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  • Telling Parents About Foreskin Restoration

    Hello, this is my first post. I have been manually stretching for a little over a month. I have let a few people know, but I have not as of yet told my parents. They are both pro-circumcision, and I'm not sure if they will be angry, sad, or disappointed at my progress, and the fact that I am becoming uncircumcised. Fellow posters, how did your parents react when you told them you were becoming uncircumcised?

  • #2
    Never felt the need... Would be awkward, and lead to questions about my sexual orientation... which, being straight, I refuse to defend.
    PROGRESS GALLERY

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    • #3
      Well, from the other side, I am a parent.. If they are good parents despite their own opinions they will respect your decision even if they express some reservations about it.

      If they have a track record of being accepting of your choices, tell them, and why if you feel it will be a positive move for YOU.

      I'm really lucky my sons choose to share pretty much everything with me.
      Last edited by dragons; 05-15-2019, 08:43 PM. Reason: Omitted an important fact!

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      • #4
        Save~

        I would advise against sharing with parents. Even though parents are supposed to be understanding and supportive of their children, many times with something this private where they are convinced they did right their judgements, cultural views and biases are very much in the front of any "defending statements."

        And once you ring that bell, you can never un-ring it.

        If you were to share this info, could or would they heckle or tease you because they feel you are doing something foolish, unneeded, etc? Have they done this in the past with anything you felt strongly about and shared?

        In my case I grew up in an extremely abusive house with my biological mother and father. Then again things got worse when I was with my father and a step mother. Then I was "dropped off" on the steps of my mother and step father and things weren't a whole lot better. So talking to them about being circumcised or why is not or would not have been an option.

        Later, I was adopted by a Chinese family that came from Thailand. While I lived and learned with them there was obvious things that were NOT talked about. Privates were certainly one of those things. But snide remarks were mentioned about my "Turtle head" being different because of being an American was laughable.

        Obviously I could not talk to them about my questions or feelings. It just was.

        Now that I am restoring, even if I could talk to my Chinese parents about this, They would tease and heckle in sly but obvious oriental ways that would be worse than going thru the "difference of Turtle Heads talk" and that was bad enough!

        This form is the best outlet you have if you have nothing else. I don't believe any one would fault you for your feelings, or criticize you for asking questions. We have a unique support system here, while it is not in person (face to face) it is supportive.

        Hope this helps

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        • #5
          If my parents had lived to the age I was when i seriously started restoring, I would have taken the greatest delight in telling them what I was doing, and that I was defying the evil act that they had forced upon me and my brother (who will not discuss this atrocity with me. I can still see the look of terror in his eyes during that night in the hospital when the Crown of Thorns around his penis started hurting him so bad that a nurse was called in with a hypodermic needle, and how terrified he was that she was going to stick that needle into his penis, but instead dripped the solution in the syringe onto the Crown of Thorns.

          By the time I did start serriously restoring my mother was deceased, and my father had gotten so senile he asked me if I was cut, and I lied and told him, "No, because when I was born, you respected the fact that one day I would be a grown man, and might deeply resent your having such a cruel thing done to me when I was not a person but nothing but a piece of property with which you could Do What Thou Wilt."

          I have never discussed what my parents had done to me and my brother in that hospital, with a pseudo counsellor, that I confided in for a number of years, but just how hard it is living with other people, includng your family.

          He of course, got tired of it, and told me; "you didn't like your mother. you didn't like your father. you didn't like your brother. you need to forgive them. You pray and ask God to help you to forgive them."

          Well, I did not need to forgive them. As I watched them go to their horrible, physically painful and emotionally tormented deaths, all I could do was look at them with total pity.

          I do have dreams continually, where they are in good health and in their right minds, and tell them how much I resent and despise what they did to me and my brother, and that I am defying them by restoring.

          I wish I could have started successfully restoring when they were still in the physical and mental condition to have told them that, but it was just too late.

          No great regrets. I can still have the satisfaction that I am defying them, even if they don't know it.

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          • #6
            That’s a good question and one that I have not spent a lot of time thinking about it. I did contemplate telling my parents once, but I started restoring later in life (closer to being 50) and my parents were elderly. We never really discussed such matters of sex and genitals. I just remember getting the old fashion lectures and attitudes about sex and the only time I remember the subject of a foreskin being brought up was when I was a kid. Properly when I was about 8 and asking my dad what a foreskin was. He explained it without without any problems until I asked why I didn’t have one. Let’s just say it never got spoken of again.
            Anyway, they have now passed away.

            Fortunately, I think people are a lot better informed nowadays, at least information is readily available, whether people choose to take it on board is another matter.

            But for your question, rather than talking about me, I think it comes down to the type of relationship that you have with your parents and you would know them better than anyone and would best know how they would react. If you are concerned that you will get a negative reaction from them, I would simply take the attitude that it is a personal matter and not their concern. If at some future time that the subject of circumcision gets raised you can always chime in with your views and the fact the many men all around the world are actively trying to repair the damage the was inflicted on them.
            To borrow a phrase, Your body, your choice.


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            • #7
              They were not very supportive about it, They didn't quite understand why I was doing it. "You can't get your foreskin back" "It's cleaner"( What a lie!) My parents are religious so they told me it was something about my relationship with God.. even though the New Testament says it doesn't matter. I was angry for a while but now I am not as mad about it.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by 4SkinGuy View Post
                They were not very supportive about it, They didn't quite understand why I was doing it. "You can't get your foreskin back" "It's cleaner"( What a lie!) My parents are religious so they told me it was something about my relationship with God.. even though the New Testament says it doesn't matter. I was angry for a while but now I am not as mad about it.
                So was it done for social or religious reasons? The way you are wording it, it sounds like both. For me as a Christian, circumcision is not an aspect of my faith, but my parents 'went along with society'.

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                • #9
                  I was 39. I walked next door to my mom's house and said: "I'm going to need any records you can help me locate about my circumcision; who did it, who paid, what was signed, where it happened, because I'm probably going to sue for damages."

                  She says: "I assumed everything worked fine since you have two beautiful children."

                  "My standard for what a penis should do extends beyond reproduction."

                  She says: "Well, we assumed it would be easier to clean without all that extra skin there. Your father had no end of trouble until they did his."

                  I hand her a bunch of articles to read. "Have a look at this stuff, and if you use the word 'extra' again, we're not friends."

                  It turns out (I found out at age 42 by asking him) my father WAS NEVER circumcised, although she apparently thought he was. HOW DARE society place the privilege to decide about a sexual future for one person in ANOTHER PERSON'S hands?!? When that other person will likely have a whole different level of involvement with and emphasis on matters sexual?

                  And it turns out my cutter was long dead at this point, no surprise.
                  -Ron Low
                  [email protected]
                  847 414-1692 Chicago

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by savethechildren View Post

                    So was it done for social or religious reasons? The way you are wording it, it sounds like both. For me as a Christian, circumcision is not an aspect of my faith, but my parents 'went along with society'.
                    Religious reasons and social reasons, I guess you could say. "It shows others that you belong to Jesus" They said. But they also tried to scare me and told me that one of my cousins was uncircumcised and he had horrible infections before he got circumcised. So I think you're right, I think it's both. I was also told "We didn't get to decide how much skin to cut off" which made me angry because i knew that was a lie. (however, I have asked God to help me forgive my parents because even though they mutilated me, they did what they thought was right at the time and i know Christ calls us to forgive 70 times 7.. Meaning, always forgive. Forgiving doesn't mean that what they did was okay (nor does it justify it), but that Christ calls us to let it go and get peace about it. Oh and You're welcome to PM me if you want to, we can talk about it more if you want, i'd be happy to.

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by 4SkinGuy View Post
                      Religious reasons and social reasons, I guess you could say. "It shows others that you belong to Jesus" They said. But they also tried to scare me and told me that one of my cousins was uncircumcised and he had horrible infections before he got circumcised.
                      St. Paul actually preached that there is no benefit to circumcision - and faced persecution for it!

                      Galatians 5 6 For in Jesus Christ neither circumcision availeth any thing, nor uncircumcision; but faith which worketh by love.

                      Galatians 5 11 And I, brethren, if I yet preach circumcision, why do I yet suffer persecution? then is the offence of the cross ceased.

                      As for the alleged infection your friend had, I'm not sure what it was, but doctors ideally should have found alternative treatment.

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by savethechildren View Post

                        St. Paul actually preached that there is no benefit to circumcision - and faced persecution for it!

                        Galatians 5 6 For in Jesus Christ neither circumcision availeth any thing, nor uncircumcision; but faith which worketh by love.

                        Galatians 5 11 And I, brethren, if I yet preach circumcision, why do I yet suffer persecution? then is the offence of the cross ceased.

                        As for the alleged infection your friend had, I'm not sure what it was, but doctors ideally should have found alternative treatment.
                        Exactly.. I believe as you do, but the problem is most doctors see it as a extra bit of skin not as a vital part of the male reproductive system.

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                        • #13
                          Without your parents, you wouldn't be alive let alone having a small piece of flesh to lay claim of.
                          PROGRESS GALLERY

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by 4SkinGuy View Post

                            Exactly.. I believe as you do, but the problem is most doctors see it as a extra bit of skin not as a vital part of the male reproductive system.
                            The reason these bastards see it as "extra skin" is because they were cut as infants and were not taught ANYTHING about the foreskin in medical school except how to cut it off and they don't know what they are missing. Then there's the "first, do no harm" thing, the very FIRST provision of the Hippocratic (hypocritic?) Oath.
                            The "cleanliness" argument absolutely kills me. Intact guys that have a problem with this don't have that problem because they have a foreskin. They have that problem because they are inherently slobs and have a whole slew of other hygiene issues as well. You mouth gets wayyy grosser if you don't brush your teeth for ONE DAY than any intact dick ever would get. And the "prevention of disease" thing is equally ridiculous. It's like saying you won't get cavities if we pull all your teeth!
                            Rant over.

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by parsecskin View Post

                              The reason these bastards see it as "extra skin" is because they were cut as infants and were not taught ANYTHING about the foreskin in medical school except how to cut it off and they don't know what they are missing. Then there's the "first, do no harm" thing, the very FIRST provision of the Hippocratic (hypocritic?) Oath.
                              The "cleanliness" argument absolutely kills me. Intact guys that have a problem with this don't have that problem because they have a foreskin. They have that problem because they are inherently slobs and have a whole slew of other hygiene issues as well. You mouth gets wayyy grosser if you don't brush your teeth for ONE DAY than any intact dick ever would get. And the "prevention of disease" thing is equally ridiculous. It's like saying you won't get cavities if we pull all your teeth!
                              Rant over.
                              Exactly..

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