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Met an intactivist at work!

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  • Met an intactivist at work!

    The place where I work just hired a new guy and he and I have a few things in common, especially the skeptical way we often see things and I overhead him say something along the lines of "I still can't understand why I was circumcised!?" and I was like "don't even get me started on this shit" (I try not to carry the anger and frustration on circ issues throughout my day because it stresses me out) then he said "yea, don't like to think about it because it makes you pissed". I said "well I'm restoring my foreskin so if that's any indication on how much I'm against it". He then was like "woah! I didn't think I would meet anybody that restored and was against circumcision like me. I never tried restoring but I have a loose cut so It's not that bad I guess." He then asked me how I was restoring and I told him I was wearing a device, he though it was really cool. I kinda kept it quiet and almost dismissed him because I didn't want my co-workers or my boss to hear it because they will probably make fun of me and harass me constantly about it. I would like to talk to him more about it sometime when we're away from the other employees since they don't understand like we do. Who knows, I might be able to give him a reason to restore but at least it's someone to talk to irl. I've now only told 2 people that i'm restoring and the other is a close friend, he's supportive of me with anything that I do but he hasn't "found the truth" about circumcision and I don't want to expose him to that emotional pain of finding out.
    Anybody else happen to have an experience like this of finding someone that's an intactivist in just daily life? would you approach them and tell them you're against circumcision too? Is anybody worried about their friends or co-workers thinking you're a weirdo if you talk about this stuff?

  • #2
    Only person I have ever felt comfortable enough discussing the topic with is a close friend. He is the only person who I have ever voluntarily allowed to know that I am cut (my mother needs to learn to not tell people about her adult son's genitals, and stop showing people naked baby photos - but I digress). He isn't cut himself, but also suffers from pretty bad body issues - all his friends that he grew up with are cut, so he at least knows what it's like to be the odd one out, even if he was lucky enough to be on the right side of the equation. I told him about my restoration plans last weekend, which he supports. It's funny - he rates circumcision is no big deal, but I think he's starting to get the idea of how damaging it is.

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    • #3
      Originally posted by Circusclown View Post
      Only person I have ever felt comfortable enough discussing the topic with is a close friend. He is the only person who I have ever voluntarily allowed to know that I am cut (my mother needs to learn to not tell people about her adult son's genitals, and stop showing people naked baby photos - but I digress). He isn't cut himself, but also suffers from pretty bad body issues - all his friends that he grew up with are cut, so he at least knows what it's like to be the odd one out, even if he was lucky enough to be on the right side of the equation. I told him about my restoration plans last weekend, which he supports. It's funny - he rates circumcision is no big deal, but I think he's starting to get the idea of how damaging it is.
      Your mother is weird.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Circusclown View Post
        Only person I have ever felt comfortable enough discussing the topic with is a close friend. He is the only person who I have ever voluntarily allowed to know that I am cut (my mother needs to learn to not tell people about her adult son's genitals, and stop showing people naked baby photos - but I digress). He isn't cut himself, but also suffers from pretty bad body issues - all his friends that he grew up with are cut, so he at least knows what it's like to be the odd one out, even if he was lucky enough to be on the right side of the equation. I told him about my restoration plans last weekend, which he supports. It's funny - he rates circumcision is no big deal, but I think he's starting to get the idea of how damaging it is.
        If I were you I'd make sure to let my friend know exactly how circumcision harms and why it shouldn't be commonly practiced anymore, I'd tell him that he should feel lucky that he has a foreskin and he should appreciate it and it's benefits. I've told my friend how circumcision damages the penis and why I restore but I don't go into too much detail, he has depression and I don't want to give him one more thing to hate about himself. However I am hopeful that I gave him enough information that gives him the knowledge to decide not to circumcise his son if he ever has one and that's definitely a step in the right direction.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by erie_eunit View Post

          Your mother is weird.
          Just to clarify - 2 scenarios:
          1) the common one: she pulls out the baby photos, and it is pretty self-explanatory where it goes from here. I should have burned those naked baby photos years ago - I actually did consider it when I was 10.
          2) a once off with my then best-friend. My mother was talking to my best-friend about something and said "I don't believe in circumcision, but both my sons are circumcised", to which my friend replied "I didn't know you were circumcised" - I felt like walking into the kitchen, grabbing a knife and ending it. My biggest secret that I so carefully hid from my best friend for over a decade (and this friend isn't great at keeping secrets, by the way) - and my mother just tells him like it's no big deal. I guess. in her defense, I never talk about it with her - so I guess she doesn't realise how serious it is.

          Also had to laugh at her "I don't believe in circumcision" comment. For one this, as a staunch Christian - she might have noted Galatians 5:2 "Mark my words! I, Paul, tell you that if you let yourselves be circumcised, Christ will be of no value to you at all." - the practice of circumcision in my family originates from our Jewish ancestry (i.e. exactly what Paul was talking about here), but no one in my family has been a practicing Jew since my grandparents converted in the 50's - so surely if she didn't believe in it, she should have stood up for it. I guess she didn't know any better and had been lied to by doctors just like everyone else.

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          • #6
            I told my closest friends. Same thing actually. One of my friends wanted to know how to restore.
            View My Progress Gallery @ https://foreskinrestoration.vbulleti...ooded-progress

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            • #7
              Originally posted by resto-mod View Post

              If I were you I'd make sure to let my friend know exactly how circumcision harms and why it shouldn't be commonly practiced anymore, I'd tell him that he should feel lucky that he has a foreskin and he should appreciate it and it's benefits. I've told my friend how circumcision damages the penis and why I restore but I don't go into too much detail, he has depression and I don't want to give him one more thing to hate about himself. However I am hopeful that I gave him enough information that gives him the knowledge to decide not to circumcise his son if he ever has one and that's definitely a step in the right direction.
              To be honest - my biggest fear when I first shared with him how much I hated my circumcision was that he'd go out and get circumcised just to make me feel better. Fortunately he didn't. He agrees that no parent should have a right to circumcise their child (even for religious reasons), but he is not opposed to people electing to get cut of their own free will.

              Incidentally this is a topic we have discussed a lot since I told him how much I hate circumcision. Discovering this website has also been a massive help.
              Last edited by Circusclown; 11-07-2017, 01:54 AM. Reason: TMI removed

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              • #8
                There's nothing wrong with and ADULT choosing to have this done IF they have been fully and properly informed and educated about EXACTLY what the procedure entails, all the functions of the foreskin, what they're going to lose, just how painful this procedure is, how they will have to adapt to NOT having a foreskin and what the future holds for them down the road when they get older. Unfortunately NONE OF this ever happens. If doctors actually did This, nobody would EVER opt for it except in the rare medically necessary cases. If I had been properly informed by the bastard that lied to and cut me, I'd still have my foreskin!
                Seems like a classic mal-practice scenario, but good luck trying to be successful with a lawsuit with all the brainwashed pro cutters out there. It will take time to educate the masses.

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                • #9
                  I agree - much like anyone is free to have a tattoo, piercing etc. For that matter, there's nothing stopping you from cutting your feet off, to avoid the possibility of dying due to tripping over your own shoelaces. But it is exactly what you say - people must be properly informed, and hopefully sites like this will help spread that awareness.

                  Funny enough - this has to be the only online forum I have ever seen relating to a controversial topic where basically everyone agrees.

                  Meanwhile there are still 13 year olds being circumcised with rocks in rural areas on this planet. And many of them die every year from complications regarding this, while others "just" lose their full penis. So I guess there is always someone else who has it worse than you.

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by parsecskin View Post
                    There's nothing wrong with and ADULT choosing to have this done IF they have been fully and properly informed and educated about EXACTLY what the procedure entails, all the functions of the foreskin, what they're going to lose, just how painful this procedure is, how they will have to adapt to NOT having a foreskin and what the future holds for them down the road when they get older. Unfortunately NONE OF this ever happens. If doctors actually did This, nobody would EVER opt for it except in the rare medically necessary cases. If I had been properly informed by the bastard that lied to and cut me, I'd still have my foreskin!
                    Seems like a classic mal-practice scenario, but good luck trying to be successful with a lawsuit with all the brainwashed pro cutters out there. It will take time to educate the masses.
                    ^ This ^

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Circusclown View Post

                      Just to clarify - 2 scenarios:
                      1) the common one: she pulls out the baby photos, and it is pretty self-explanatory where it goes from here. I should have burned those naked baby photos years ago - I actually did consider it when I was 10.
                      2) a once off with my then best-friend. My mother was talking to my best-friend about something and said "I don't believe in circumcision, but both my sons are circumcised", to which my friend replied "I didn't know you were circumcised" - I felt like walking into the kitchen, grabbing a knife and ending it. My biggest secret that I so carefully hid from my best friend for over a decade (and this friend isn't great at keeping secrets, by the way) - and my mother just tells him like it's no big deal. I guess. in her defense, I never talk about it with her - so I guess she doesn't realise how serious it is.

                      Also had to laugh at her "I don't believe in circumcision" comment. For one this, as a staunch Christian - she might have noted Galatians 5:2 "Mark my words! I, Paul, tell you that if you let yourselves be circumcised, Christ will be of no value to you at all." - the practice of circumcision in my family originates from our Jewish ancestry (i.e. exactly what Paul was talking about here), but no one in my family has been a practicing Jew since my grandparents converted in the 50's - so surely if she didn't believe in it, she should have stood up for it. I guess she didn't know any better and had been lied to by doctors just like everyone else.
                      Soooooooooo much cringe. What a fucked over situation. :/ I don't envy you of having to deal with this shit. I'm glad I don't have to, just, dayum.

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