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Hello - I just registered here. I would like to post in the section on Partners of Restorers, but am having trouble figuring out how to even post! My husband is circumcised. I am the wife, and although my husband is not restoring, I have questions for folks who are in the process. I think it would benefit him. I did not want to assume that his lack of interest in restoring was the end of the discussion between us. So I thought I would register here. I don't want to offend my husband on this sensitive topic -- he is the nicest person on the planet. Are there any other wives / partners out there with comments for me? Other thoughts? Thank you everyone!
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Hi Cassandra, hope you have a good time here. I've been a member of the old forum for about a year, but since this is a new home I'm sort of new too!
I'm not a wife or anybody's partner, but I've been restoring for about 2 and a half years now, and would be happy to answer any questions you might have. -
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I would be wary of trying to force this issue with him. Consciously facing the reality of being cut can be very traumatic in itself, and is pretty much necesary to start restoring otherwise why would anyone bother doing it? The best you can do as his partner is to support him but you cannot make him face up to his circumcision if he is not inclined to. Most cut men never really question what was done to them, especially if it was done at infancy.Comment
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Thanks for the replies. I should have included in my original post that my husband is in the process of dealing with the issue of being cut. He does not deny at all the damage it has done to him. In addition, he is a father who has broken the MGM cycle -- my husband is cut, but our son is intact.Comment
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Congrats on making the right decision for your son!
Since he's aware of what's happened, it would be best for him to start as soon as possible. I'd recommend starting with manual stretching for at least a few months before moving on to a device of any kind-usually they require some amount of loose skin to be utilized effectively.Comment
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You both should watch "Elephant in the Hospital" on YouTube together. It's a great documentary that outlines everything about the foreskin and what is lost to circumcision as well as the ethics of it. Then both of you should go to www.norm.org and research restoration and get him going on it. You BOTH will be amazed at the difference. I was cut as an adult and know the difference first hand. IT IS HUGE. Restoring will get him back to about 80% of where he should be instead of about 20%. It's that much of a difference! Good luck.Comment
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I think the way to ease someone into restoring without offending is to gift them a Your-Skin Cone http://tlctugger.com/your-skin-cone/ Even if they never use it there is not a huge financial loss, since TLC Tugger has a 3-months no-questions-asked refund option period.
After the glans rejuvenates a bit intercourse then will probably be less forceful. There may be some bouts of perceived prematurity from the new ticklishness. Be prepared to laugh those off and just enjoy rubbing and nibbling and cherishing each other until he's ready for more. It will also help if he re-doubles his foreplay efforts rather than trying to get the whole job done with just his penis.
And a note for female partners: Sex can stressful (if not boring) for him if it's always a man's job to give a woman an orgasm. There is a big difference between "giving" him an orgasm and letting him do you until he "has" an orgasm (likely induced by the emotional response to your responsiveness). So I say, at least one time out of ten let him relax, and you MAKE HIM CLIMAX. That feeling of being overwhelmed by an external stimulus is WAY different from basically tickling himself (by his own movements) in your vagina. The brain knows he's in charge. It's different, just like trying to tickle some other body part yourself doesn't work. I'm going on and on about HIS sexual excitement, because once he realizes you have his back and want to be his dream princess, he will be more receptive to your assertions about needing a normal amount of slack on his penis for your comfort and fulfillment. Your prince is more likely to step up to the plate.Comment
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